Hello love,
I wanted to share why I think filling your cup up can derail your emotional eating efforts.
I have nothing against filling your cup up. Sometimes when we hear certain advice we might think “yes” if I keep doing this I’ll feel good. But what i’ve found with a lot of advice is that it can be a bandaid.
We need to dive deeper.
This is something I went through for years with the affirmations, trying to do all the things (diets, exercise, positive thoughts, distraction) to feel good, etc and still not getting anywhere.
Why it doesn’t work
Part of the reason filling your cup up doesn’t work is because your cup is already full…of something else.
Sometimes as emotional eaters we are told we need to meet our needs but the reality is that we ARE “meeting” our needs but in a dysfunctional way. IE there is something already in the cup.
What we need to do is empty out the cup, clean it out before we can put in this new way of being.
So why does filling your cup not work?
Because there is so much going on under the surface with emotional eating. Emotional eating is a coping pattern. It’s how you’ve been tying to meet your needs. It’s not meeting the need in a functional way but it is taking up space.
The way we are trying to meet our needs is to go to food to soothe ourselves whenever any discomfort or uncomfortable emotions come up. In order to replace that behaviour we need to clean out “the cup” and resolve this pattern.
When we have a dysfunctional pattern we need to process, resolve and integrate it. We need to transform it, not put something else on top.
There is a deeper pattern at play and is filling the cup. The cup is full of stale coffee if you will.
We need to clean it our and pour in something more appetizing 🙂
Cleaning out the cup, and pouring in something new
When I do the deeper work with clients I find that the emotional pattern is usually from childhood. It is deeply ingrained in our brain. As time goes on there are more layers added to the core pattern including the infamous diet mentality and body image issues.
The way we clean up this collective pattern and put in something more desirable in is through a step by step process.
The process I use to help clients is through The Emotional Eating Evolution Program.
In the program you work through 4 phases with lots of guidance and support. This is key because there can be fear, doubt and uncertainty that arises as you shift to a new way of being.
Why doing it on your own can make you spiral…
If you are doing this on your own the same fears and doubts come up BUT the resistance usually wins. This is what makes you spiral back into old patterns. When there is support and guidance and someone seeing the bigger picture it is easier to navigate and move forward.
In the different phases of the program (true nourishment, body acceptance, emotional wellness and lifestyle) different forms of resistance can come up. We move through and process the resistance with coaching and if it is deeply rooted we use somatic mediations to resolve it.
The emotional eating pattern is deeply rooted and subconscious and we transform it throughout the program. The program is designed to move you through that transformational process because this is what is holding your back from feeling confident in your body and around food.
This is how we fill our cup with what we want. We need to empty then fill up in a sustainable way.
The only time we had an empty cup was when we were babies and then it got filled up with a lot of crap and things we didn’t need. Maybe it helped us survive and cope but now we want to thrive.
We want to move forward and feel good so we need to clean up what’s been going on and create this new way which takes some effort but much less than all the dieting, and failed attempts.
So if you are ready to feel good in your body and around food in a functional way check out The Emotional Eating Evolution Program here or book in an Emotional Eating Assessment call to see how the program can support your journey.
To transformation,
Michelle
Certified Holistic Nutritionist + Emotional Eating Expert