I just read an inspiring post by my friend over at edible vie and it made me think about 2012 and where I was around this time last year. I was reeling from a crazy experience teaching, surrounded by unkind and demeaning individuals and really looking at my life and trying to decide where I wanted to go. From deep within me I knew I couldn’t be a part of the system that I was so desperately trying to stay in. I had jumped through many hoops in the past and was on the same path again with teaching. The hoops were becoming more erratic and bizarre and quite unhealthy for me so after a near mental breakdown over the Christmas break over a year ago I decided that teaching in the public system was not for me. I loved teaching but not like this. I loved nutrition and would rather be teaching that or at least immersed in it.
Nutrition was healing, uplifting and a huge part of my everyday life already plus I was truly passionate about it. I was told by everyone including my fiancé that I was giving up before I had even started but I knew deep down I needed to change and to start listening to myself. I knew I couldn’t be part of a system I didn’t fully believe in and couldn’t see myself jumping through more and more ‘hoops’ in a bureaucratic system. I was ready to make my own rules and be open to the scary world of possibility. I realized that even though I have always followed my gut I was still managing to take the ‘safe’ route. I never quite allowed myself to choose the career of my choice for fear of hating it or perhaps for fear of standing out.
In January, 2012 I decided that I wanted to go into holistic nutrition, or at least something that involved food and inspiring others. Nutrition seemed to be all that I read, talked about, read about and what really inspired me. I saw beautiful pictures of food that nourished the body and soul.
Hand in hand with this inspiration I read many books that helped me to listen to my inner voice including Add More ~Ing to Your Life and The Fire Starter Sessions. These books helped me hone in to what I really wanted.
This January I find myself doing the same thing; reading books to help me create my year ahead. I’m reading/doing the May Cause Miracles exercises and The Desire Map. I’m not one to have resolutions but I do manage to create a list of things I want to accomplish and they tend to magically happen! Perhaps it’s all the inner work I do 🙂
Over the course of the last year I’ve learned to be open to my passions and desires and have experienced things simply because I was open to it. I’ve traveled more than I ever have (5 trips including; Denmark, England, Sweden, Scotland, France, Portugal, New York, Detroit, Puerto Rico, San Francisco and Tucson), taught at a retreat for raw foods, started on the path to being a certified Nutritionist, and met people that are as into nutrition as I am. I feel like I am finally finding my tribe so to speak 🙂 This past year has been really great but also filled with moments of self-doubt and moving forward faithfully hoping there would be something to land on.
This year I plan to do the same! It seemed to have worked last year so I am excited to see what this year brings. I expect bigger and brighter desires to come through. Hopefully you are all doing the same thing and if not it’s never too late to find your true self and what really fulfills you!
To a healthy, and happy 2013!